I am not special, I am unique

My life is slowly leaking away like a bottle with a big hole in it.. Am I spending it correctly? Going around staying in class, working at the weekends.. playing games at my free time.. is this what I really want? I am pretty sure the situation wouldn't be the same in the near future.. 

A side of me tells me that I am happy, but the other.. slowly breaking down..

I seem to have this period of time everyday where is just look at what I am doing, and regret everything immediately. 

When I was younger, I always question the meaning of life and feared the nearing end. I think of how it would hurt to die and why we pursue happiness even if we would die. And then I found a new meaning.. to have fun and to have someone to care and cares about you..

I guess the hidden me has finally raised from the fake masks that I put on.